How is it that I’ve been self-isolating for over three weeks now, and I’m experiencing more acute social fatigue than I do when I’m free to leave the house whenever I want?
Fucking social media.
A friend of mine recently described the current state of Twitter — in a Tweet, of course — as one long scrolling panic attack. Totally on point.
But it’s not just Twitter. Facebook, YouTube, Instagram — it’s hard to go anywhere on the social internet* these days without feeling like you’re under constant threat… Threat of pressured conspicuous consumption. (Retail COVID therapy, anyone?) Threat of global pandemic. Threat of a super wealthy, predatory capitalist vampire class and its puppet government enriching themselves at the expense of the rest us. Threat of the rest of us, who can’t seem to get our heads out of our asses for long enough to realize the threats we’re under because we’re too busy arguing online about who’s at fault for all these threats. The threat of existential exhaustion from constantly being under threat — fucking christ how much more of this shit can I take?! Etc.
If there’s one thing I really hope to take away from this whole quarantine thing, it’s to never forget that time spent staring at social media is mostly wasted time.
All the time throughout the day I spend scrolling though Instagram or Twitter (my chosen social media poisons) is time I could have spent doing something that actually enriches me as a person — playing music, reading a book, learning a language, writing, making or editing photographs, connecting remotely with friends and family… Not only are those all things I actually do, but they’re also things I usually “struggle” to find time to do. I’ve never struggled to find time to stare at social media.
Yes, I’m generally pretty busy (less so under forced isolation, even though I’m fortunate enough to still be working), but I get those weekly screen time reports on my phone, and I see exactly how much I waste on social media. It’s literally hours every week. If I stopped fucking around on Twitter and the ‘Gram, I might have already achieved basic fluency in German or Spanish, or have read a few more books, finished putting together a couple more photo zines, have hours more recorded music, be better about maintaining a training regimen in isolation, etc.
I tell myself that I go to social media to keep up with the latest news and info with the least amount of bullshit. I guess there is some truth to that. Most established news outlets (TV, radio, online) spew little more than trash corporate talking points, and social media is supposed to facilitate and amplify independent voices, right?
And sure there’s some of that out there, but it’s a double-edged sword: For every independent voice of truth, rational viewpoint, and thread of thoughtful conversation on social media, there are dozens lunatic dullards flooding the internet with opinions and ideas that no one ever asked for, as if they’re logical, factual or valuable. They’re none of those things. But that’s free-speech I guess, and while I’m not a fan of curtailing people’s ability to speak their minds, no matter how asinine, nowhere is the failing of American intellect and emotional intelligence more frustratingly on public display than social media. So it is what it is.
I think I’ve come to terms with an acceptable amount of social media consumption: Get my quick news fix (don’t ever read the fucking comments), scan for new music / art / photography / design, look at some cool classic cars / architecture / boxing clips, and check in on friends from afar… then get the hell off that shit. I figure if I can’t do all that in 15 minutes, maybe twice a day, I’m seriously fucking up.
Beyond that, though, trying to balance being an informed citizen and not turning into a total basketcase is a constant battle. So what’s the solution? Fuck I don’t know.
I deleted my Facebook page in 2018 and it was extremely liberating. I don’t miss it at all, even though I no longer know when most of my favorite bands are touring or releasing new music, when anyone got married, has a birthday, or drank a smoothie. But I also don’t miss feigning interest in events I get invited to but couldn’t actually give a shit about, and I really don’t miss learning more than I wanted to about the opinions of people who, in many cases, I’m only connected to through a viscously manipulative advertising machine masquerading as a “community.”
My point is, ultimately — framed in terms of what we’re all going through now — I think it all comes back to social distancing.
Do you really need to know the mundane details of the daily lives of everyone you’ve ever met for long enough to seek each other out on social media? Can you really not live without reading every half-assed hot-take about the daily outrage from the worlds of politics, Hollywood, or whatever cultural landscape matters most to you? Probably not.
So give it some space. Put the phone down, or at least swap out FB, Twitter and the ‘Gram for Candy Crush (the productivity levels are about the same, and I guarantee you that puzzle games are way less stressful).
And okay, I realize that we’re all relying on social media right now to keep us connected and informed because we’re forcibly separated (and for a good cause), but once we’re all back out in the world, maybe let’s all do this: Take two weeks off. Don’t use Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc. Just walk away, and see how it changes your perspective. It’ll probably make you happier and healthier.
(Oh and hey, don’t forget to follow me on Twitter and Instagram, @maxsidman. #likeandsubscribe)
*Except maybe TikTok. I don’t use that shit, but my daughter is on it, and from what I can tell it’s just millions of kids lip-sync reenacting movie and TV scenes, and online dance-battling while standing still ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[Adaptive Strategies is a blog series I’m working on while I’m confined to my home during the Bay Area’s coronavirus shelter-in-place lockdown. Each of these posts is about whatever I happen to be going through, or what I’m doing to deal with whatever is going through my head, as we’re all self-isolating…or maybe they’re about nothing in particular.]